peep*blog » lost bonus summer: the linda mccartney story

lost bonus summer: the linda mccartney story 7July10

Just because Lost is over doesn’t mean it’s over over. I mean, it does, but it doesn’t mean the Bonus Content has to end. Welcome to Lost: Bonus Summer, where we check out what the Lost ppl are up to now that they’re off the island (/in heaven).

This week: The Linda McCartney Story, starring Elizabeth Mitchell.

So, it turns out that I have no interest in the story of Linda McCartney. She seems like she was a perfectly nice person, and I have nothing against her, but her story – at least the one being told in this movie – is a little boring. I mean, the most exciting thing that happened was when that man with the giant afro kept shuffling behind Paul so that it looked like Paul had a giant afro wig on.

So, in case you’re curious, she was a photographer at a small magazine who convinced her editor to let her photograph the Rolling Stones, and then she became basically a groupie and slept with/took photographs of lots of musicians. Then she went to London to take pictures of the Beatles for a book project, met Paul who contacted her a year later and told her to drop everything and meet him in LA so that they could have sex (after meeting her once and letting a year go by?), and then they got married, had kids, started a new band together after the Beatles broke up, became vegans or something, moved to a farm or whatever, she got cancer, and then she died.

“Our band is the worst!”

So, anyway, rather than going through the whole plot of the movie in detail, I thought I’d just point out how poorly casted this movie was. I mean, it’s made for tv, so it’s clearly way low budget. And I’m perfectly aware that it’s kind of impossible to find people that look/sound enough like the real people, so you kind of have to cast for someone who’s at least got the “feel” of the person? Which is why I think they should not make biopics. But, if they’re gonna keep making biopics (which I used to think was pronounced “bi-OP-ics” and when I figured out that you pronounced the “bio” part like “bio” like “biography” and “pics” was like “pics” like “pictures” like “moving pictures” like “movies”, it blew my mind. This happened about a year ago.), I get to keep making fun of the casting. So, from most to least, this is how closely the actors resembled the people they were supposed to be portraying.

1. Paul McCartney

I mean, this one wasn’t too bad, I guess. He looks more like Paul McCartney than the guy who played him in the other awful made for tv Beatles movie, Two of Us.

2. Diane Keaton

And pretty much anyone with a hat and round glasses can look like Diane Keaton from far away. It’s all downhill from here.

3. George Harrison

I know. But, 3-6 is pretty much a toss-up in terms of the order.

4. Elton John

I mean, I think that’s supposed to be Elton John?

5. John Lennon & Yoko Ono

“That’s who we’re playing? Really?”

6. John Lennon

So, this scene was supposed to be taking place around 1970, I guess, because it was just around the point where the Beatles broke up. So, John was around 30? Why does this guy look so old?

Incidentally, there was actually a better scene than the part with the afro shuffler. So, the Beatles broke up and then Paul sued John or something? I don’t know, something about the record company they both owned? It doesn’t matter. The point is, they had completely fallen out with each other, and John showed up at Paul’s house in this ridiculous, like, “it’s my wedding day and I want a fancy old-fashioned looking car” limo.