A long time ago, in high school, my friend Laura and I used to speak to each other in Spanish a lot. We’ve since forgotten almost all the Spanish we knew, but anyway, our favorite Spanish word was panqueques (pancakes). If the word garbaje had been a real word, that would have been our favorite word, but anyway, it was panqueques. I also used to be able to do a pretty good Bette Davis impression, and Laura would pretend to be knocking on the door to Bette Davis’ room, saying that she had my panqueques, and I would say, as Bette Davis, that I didn’t order any panqueques and then I would pretend my chair was a wheelchair and I would wheel over to the drawer and get out a gun and point it at the door and tell her to go away. We performed this little play for each other usually once a day, sometimes more. I don’t really find Richard and his guyliner (I still say it’s not thick lashes. I still say he got permanent makeup.) all that attractive, but he was way hot speaking Spanish. If Ricardo showed up at my door with panqueques, I would let him in. Panqueques doesn’t have a double meaning. I mean that if Ricardo showed up at my door with a plate of actual pancakes, I would let him in.
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