A long, long time ago, Sal and I filled up six tapes with episodes of Saved by the Bell. This was way before the dvds. And they’re really disorganized and sometimes they get cut off on the end (and Sally insists that it was not her fault, but the fault of the old vcr, but I don’t believe her), but we have just about every episode ever of SBTB. So, anyway, we watched a couple tonight, including the episode where Kelly becomes this super famous model for the day, and the one where Mr. Belding’s never-before-or-since-mentioned brother Rod comes to the school as a sub and then sort of tries to take over Belding’s life. Which is so awesome, especially considering the fact that Rod’s a total perv.
Case in point: he drags Zach and Screech out of class to hang out in Belding’s office and watch baseball. And they’re all drinking “soda” (but it’s so obviously beer). And Rod constantly has his hand on his crotch and he wears super tight jeans. And, when Rod decides to take time out of history class to teach the kids about white water rafting (the senior trip he convinced them to take, leaving poor Mr. Belding’s Yosemite trip literally in the trash!), he tells them to practice CPR. But, it’s not really CPR, because he has Jessie and Kelly lie on the floor (with their mouths closed, by the way) and Slater and Zach lean in and “go for it.” Total perv! Sally thinks he was trying to make some kind of high school teenage porn. So gross.
Anyway, the point of all of this is that we’ve been inside all the time lately, being forced to find indoor entertainment (we played Clue tonight!). It’s really hot out. Like, 105-degrees hot out, and we can’t take it anymore. We couldn’t even get up the energy (after having been in and out of the car all day on an unsuccessful trip to find a milkshake maker) to go into the pool. I mean, all the putting on bathing suits and getting towels and … keeping ourselves afloat. We just couldn’t handle it.
But, anyway, we’ve been feeling the heat something fierce over here and, although we are so trying to not let go of the summer before it’s over, it’s really hard when you’re completely stuck indoors because you feel like you can’t breathe when you step outside. It feels like you’re in a giant oven. But the only thing baking up is the sweat under your armpits. Sorry, that was gross.
But, true.
We did get ourselves down to Point Pleasant this weekend with our brother and sister-in-law, though, only to be drawn into this totally weird situation where this other family tried to pick a fight with us! I mean, we had to bring the bouncers (who also happen to be Point Pleasant cops) over to get these people to stop cursing at us. There was a grandmother involved. And she started it! Can you believe it? Well, if you’ve ever been to the Jersey shore, you probably can. We love Point Pleasant. There’s always a good story to tell when you come home.
Hopefully the temperatures will go down enough so that we can go back down to the boardwalk or to the beach or at least just venture outside soon so we don’t feel like the summer has passed us by. Which would just suck.
By the way, remember when you were in elementary school and it was really hot out and, as a big exciting treat, your teacher would shut the lights out at the end of the day? As if that made it cooler? Try recreating that sometime this week. And make one of those little paper fans. I guarantee you, you will feel ten degrees cooler. And if not? Well. Get out of my school, Rod.